Perspective

Fatigue, Faith, and a Flaming Yam- Pt 1

Goodness. It’s been a couple of weeks since I’ve written. The title of this blog post sums up the month of August fairly well. I’m breaking this down into 3 parts simply because I need to get my kids up and dressed for church. #reallife

Fatigue has been a real bear this past month. A culmination of everything “make sure the kids have a fabulous summer” and then tack on a bacterial illness and two weeks of high dose antibiotics. Ugh. My body was DONE.

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My kids got my phone and caught me resting.

I NEVER put the blame for anything with my body on MS, but had to concede on this one. I couldn’t function or fight thru the fog to think straight. I had to change my thought process from blaming MS and those flipping lesions to accepting that this is a reason.

When I associate an image with the word Blame, it looks like a kid having a tantrum. I won’t allow this situation to lower me to that.  Honestly, in the depths of the fatigue I didn’t have the energy for a tantrum. My kids, husband and work all still require attention. This body still has responsibilities.

After a solid heart to heart with my sister and a day at a women’s faith conference, I admitted that the elephant in the room is this autoimmune disease. Even though I refuse to use it as an excuse, an excuse is very different than a reason. Many factors led to my body being worn out. Multiple sclerosis is the reason for this level of fatigue.

I’m happy to say that a week later, I’m starting to feel like myself again. I’ve hit the stationary bike twice, elliptical once, and ran my outdoor route twice. All modes of transportation are much slower than when I’m at my top. Exercise sharpens my mind and improves my mood.

I’m listening to my body.

Part 2: Faith

Family · Love · Parenting · Perspective

To do or not to do?

I called my mom for reassurance. I’m a 35 year old woman who needed to hear my mom say “I think that’s a good idea for your family.”

The conversation has been mulling around in my brain for days. Do we or don’t we enroll in fall dance classes? Maybe we should try tumbling instead? Do we or don’t we encourage our son to sign up for fall flag football?

Leaning hard to the “No.” side of things, this was definitely a conversation that needed my spouse’s input. Although I am the chief get-kids-to-their-destination driver, everything we sign up for impacts all of us. Dinner schedules, my level of stress, when I need to leave work, can I work late?… All the pieces revolve around what we are committed to..

The pressure to sign up for extra kid’s activities is immense. It’s a weight I never giphy8anticipated carrying. The cost isn’t great either. Art classes, sports, dance, tumbling, volunteer opportunities, library activities…

Is my child going to be left out if she/he doesn’t sign up? Will they be athletically or academically behind?

Honestly… the answer is no.

No- all the way – no. Last time I checked, my 8 year old wasn’t trying out to be on the farm team (aka the minor leagues) for major league baseball. My daughter isn’t going to be in the Rockettes at age 6. Nor will taking the fall semester off from extra classes stunt their abilities.

Drawing this line in the sand will hopefully allow my family and friends time to be together. Let’s grill out on the patio for dinner! How about a nice bike ride on a Tuesday night after school? Invite a friend over to play for a couple of hours? Sure. I don’t need to schedule around this class or that class.

This basically sounds like utopia after the frenzied summer we’ve had. Although I swore we weren’t going to be THAT overscheduled family, we absolutely were. To say no… it’s a bold choice in our current culture. Being busy, scheduled, and enrolled in everything imaginable to enrich ourselves has left us all drained.

Our conversation about this was short and sweet. My husband agreed completely. Now, to finish convincing myself that I’m not blighting my children’s interests and aspirations I called my mother. She listened without judgement as I presented my case for NOT being involved and replied “I think that’s a good idea for your family.”

Isn’t it sad that the pressure to please others is so great that I needed to hear my mother reassure me that I was making the correct choice for MY family? Thank goodness for amazing beautiful souls like hers.

Don’t we all want to have the freedom in our schedule to do things like this?

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After a fall semester off from the extras, it’s possible that we will be ready and eager to do winter activities like basketball or dance. Perhaps we’ll discover that we enjoy less time running around. Either way, we’ll roll with it when it comes.

Creativity · Family · Fitness · Perspective

Begins with “S”

Six Miles – That’s how many glorious, relaxing miles I got in last night while my kids were at Vacation Bible School. How many times is it 6miles_LIonly 63 degrees for a July evening run in the Midwest – USA?! I’m officially one minute per mile slower than when I was getting consistent runs done.

Six miles of feeling my feet hit the road while listening to the music on my iPod. Freeing. Sanity breathing. Mind clearing. I’ve registered for a 10K in September. After last night’s run, my confidence at running it comfortably has increased. I doubt it will be a 10K PR, but I suspect I can cut time if I get in a uniform schedule.

SullivanSullivan – Our new, very large cat (Maine Coon) has decided his favorite place to lay is in a bathroom sink. I guess that’s fine…. “You do you, Sully.” Today is the 5th day since we adopted him. After having an affable feline friend for over a decade until his passing in December, the enjoyment of my husband and kids to this new guy is evident. Honestly, I’m still warming up to having an indoor pet again.

School – Dare I say it? We are edging up on less than 20 days until it starts! After we returned from Colorado and knocked out a few days at the fair, everyone seems considerably happier about school starting. The kids look forward to consistent time with friends and living a normal schedule. I swore I wouldn’t mention it until August starts…. but we had school supplies on super sale at our local store – 20 pencils for $0.99 and notebooks for $0.19 each. It would have been silly to miss that discount when those items were on the list.

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Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Other “s” encounters this week included a snake, storms, and my son’s prize winning sunflower at the fair. Have a snazzy, superb week!

Family · Fitness · Health · Parenting · Perspective

Running Away from Monday

It’s been one of those Mondays where I put on my running clothes to run before the sun came up.

But I haven’t ran yet.

It began to thunder, followed by a downpour. Intermittent sharp cloud to ground lightning.

Then I had to get the kids to daycare and myself to work – still wearing my running clothes. Call it the definition of a “Casual Monday?” Perks to owning the business and staying behind a desk.

The weather cleared. I was going to use my lunch to run. But I didn’t get a lunch and ate at my desk because customers LOVE to call and show up at lunch.

Then another thunderstorm moved in.

And I’m still sitting here at the end of the work day wearing my running clothes. I’ve been wearing my “Flipbelt” stuffed with my fully charged iPod and ear buds all. day. long.

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The kids go to VBS for two and a half hours tonight. I will be using that time to run, if not outdoors then at the gym.

I took five minutes to read about an extreme “reset diet and workout routine” that ended with fabulous results. The author of the article- who I might add was single and childless – talked about needing two hours every day at the gym.

I can’t get 30 minutes for a nice leisurely 5K.

A woman can only be functioning for so many hours of the day.

Bleh. Can I just run away from this Monday?

 

 

Perspective · Uncategorized

Courtesy

I’m a SUPER optimist. I solve problems or at least try to find a way to process and improve them.

However – I’m starting to believe that common courtesy is becoming less common…

The point of all of this is: If you make an appointment with someone, KEEP IT.

My husband and I own and operate a small business with two other full-time employees. We started this business from scratch straight out of college. Short of the couple of years I taught high school physical science/ physics classes and while I was on maternity, we’ve worked together in the office full-time.

As is frequently the case, one of us has to go somewhere to pick up or deliver parts, machinery, or trips for the deposit. We have to physically leave the office. This puts all the office responsibilities in the lap of the other person. Today, it’s my lap.

I have a list of people that are scheduled to come by, a list of phone calls to return, am manning the phone, and updating the advertising and web.

Here’s the rub. When you make an appointment to meet someone, usually you try to show up early or be prompt. 10 minutes can still an acceptable grace period if you can’t be exactly on time or early as long as it isn’t a medical appointment and you’ve called to say you are running late. When it’s over the noon hour, aka lunch, the courteous thing to do is to call if you aren’t going to make it near your appointment time.

giphy5I’ve been working on various odd jobs around my desk for 1 1/4hrs now thinking how delicious my lunch will be- the salad that I accidentally left at home and plan to get as soon as I’m done with this customer. It only takes 10 minutes to get home, unlock the house, grab the food, and be back.

However, wouldn’t it be rude if I wasn’t here in the office when that customer shows up?

So I wait.

In this current world where everyone wants everything NOW, at this very moment, would it hurt to show a little courtesy when they are going to delay others?

Let’s treat others how we’d like to be treated. Make that courtesy phone call if you are running behind. Remember, small business owners like to eat lunch too.   🙂

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Faith · Family · Love · Parenting · Perspective

What I’m Celebrating on Mother’s Day

Mother’s Day 2018.

Many moms out there were being showered with lavish gifts. Quite a few, I imagine, received no recognition at all for the day. Others were somewhere in between.

I was an ‘in-between-er’ at the low end of the spectrum. No gifts, but they did make construction paper cards. It was another day where my kids bickered, my extremely tired 5yr old melted down and crashed for 3hrs (when is school done?!), and at one point I threatened to get out of the car and let my husband proceed with the kids to our destination without me.

So yeah, basically just another day of motherhood.

Isn’t that what the day is about though? Are we supposed to be put on a pedestal on Mother’s Day or should we move our focus to the little things that are to be appreciated?

I’m not one to worship my children. They aren’t always correct. They aren’t always even pleasant to be around. And yes, I’ve told them to leave me alone or  not talk.

However, I am thankful for these little people in my tribe. I love them unconditionally- always and everywhere. I learn new things about them and myself in abundance when we are together. At times, they swell my heart with gladness. While at others, they throw me into the pit and leave me questioning what I did to make this little monster.

At church, our pastor recognized the mothers and made that the focus of his message. He spoke of   the need to lift up and support all the moms- the young and old, married, single, widowed, biological, adoptive and foster, those who have lost, and the grandmothers raising their grandchildren.

It doesn’t have to be a grand gesture. It’s effective in the little things- offering childcare for any length of time, helping load or unload bags of groceries, passing her your $10 when she’s checking out at the store, welcoming a family with children instead of frowning at their noise.

The church needs to acknowledge the shift of stay-at-home to working mothers. It’s a change that has been decades in the making. The faith community needs to embrace these weary, hard working women.

He spoke about Hagar in Genesis. She didn’t willingly become a mother. Mothers who weren’t excited to become moms need to be cared for. They are treading water. Don’t let them go under.

When Abraham (man) gave her limited water and sent her away, God (the Creator) showed her a well. Think on that comparison for a moment…

He specifically recognized all of us who have locked ourselves in a room and cried- overwhelmed by life and questioning if we are making the right choices.

Motherhood has deepened my faith exponentially. All the trials, tribulations, meltdowns and months years without solid sleep have given me a glimpse of what love without strings looks like. Love that can’t be earned. Love that just IS.

That love is what I’m celebrating on Mother’s Day.

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Family · Parenting · Perspective

Throw it in the cart

If you know me, you know how much I enjoy office supplies. Folders, highlighters, blue Bic pens, and a solid pair of scissors are a must. I love the feel of a pencil on paper- not too sharp, just dulled down enough to keep it crisp but not so sharp that it scratches the paper. IMG_3400(1)

The same goes for school supplies at the beginning of the school year. That folder with the fluffy cat on it for my 5 yr old? Absolutely. A big package of crayons? Be still my beating heart.

But you know something? It must be the end of the school year because I’m over it. Albeit temporary, I’m tired of trying to keep this stuff useful and organized.

I came to the conclusion that it’s time for school to be out when we went grocery shopping last night. My daughter’s kindergarten class needed treats. We send treats monthly- enough for both the morning and afternoon snack for her whole class. I’ve happily baked or assembled something (I think) tasty, nut-free, and generally health-conscious (minus last month’s brownies) for each month thus far. This time, she asked for strawberry loaf cake from the store’s bakery and a large jug of generic brand cheeseballs.

Sure. Throw it in the cart.

She needs a sack lunch twice in the next two weeks for end-of-school activities. “Mom, can I PLEASE have a Lunchable?” We never buy Lunchables. I can buy meat, crackers, and cheese in bulk and make our own “lunchable” combos. They are on sale 10/$10.

Sure. Throw it in the cart.

giphy3“Mom- look at those Tom & Jerry fruit snacks!” Me- I’m not paying extra to have Tom & Jerry on your fruit snacks. As I glanced down the aisle, I see that all the fruit snacks are the same price.

Sure. Whatever. Throw it in the cart.

This is seriously not me. I watch our grocery bill closely. We don’t buy crap.  But the constant activities, work commitments, and extra school stuff piled on top of the actual educational school stuff has me saying “Sure. Throw it in the cart.”

I stop short of saying I’ve given up. I made both of my kids eat vegetables at dinner a couple of nights ago. It was just one carrot each, but it was the principle of it. I still care and I’m still holding on. You aren’t free yet.

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Teachers, parents, and students alike are all feeling it. We are left with no choice except to power through the last couple weeks with a few extra Kool-Aid Jammers and some Tom & Jerry fruit snacks. We love these little people and our educational system here, so….

Let’s do this people!