Faith · Family · Parenting · Perspective

Both Sides of the Coin

As we drove to Parent-Teacher conferences this morning, I gave my husband the run-down of activities and meetings for the next two days. If you remember my post from earlier this fall, you’ll recall that we took a “not at this time” stance to almost ALL extracurricular activities so we could regroup as a family – no flag football, no dance classes, no tumbling…

The list isn’t long – Parent Teacher Conferences 8:20-9am, an orthodontist appointment at noon, customers who scheduled ahead, and an awards ceremony Friday evening that should last only an hour.

I was struck by irony when he looks at me and says “Ugh… could we have anything else on the schedule!”

 Backstory: A couple times a month since July, I’ve reminded my husband gently clearly that I need his emotional support and leadership as a parent and as a spouse to make all-the-little-things work in our family. One of his love languages is to love us by providing at which he is amazing. *Take the time to do that study (5 Love Languages) if you are in a relationship!*

As a woman with only two hands and 24 hours in the day, I am incapable of doing it all without feeling completely depleted, beat down, and depressed. There – I said it – depressed. Out of routine and unable to juggle everybody’s everything, I’ve entertained the idea of simply running away. I know, it’s a super grown-up, mature thought (sarcasm).

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Fortunately, I know I’m loved and love myself too much to do this. We have to work together to balance both of us working full-time, two full-of-life children, a marriage relationship, and minimal hobbies that keep us sane. On top of that, we both need alone time to recharge.

Last week, we hit these topics with force. (Read that as “the ship was going down…”) Since that meltdown conversation, we’ve been quite in-sync and actually offering to help each other with daily tasks that make life easier.

I can’t help think that his reaction to my short list for the next two days is somewhat attached to that previous conversation. He’s been putting in so much effort that he’s seeing the other side of the coin. Marriage and kids take both sides of the coin to function. 13 years of marriage… still learning!

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Family · Health · Parenting · Perspective

Candy Cane Confession

I have a confession. If you follow my blog, my last post was about not wanting my child to eat junk food regularly when we have healthier options.

People – we have an extra day of break from school for a teacher inservice today… My crew was moving slower than molasses, peanut butter, ketchup in a glass bottle, water flowing uphill, YOU NAME IT this morning. SLOW. M-O-T-I-O-N.

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So when my children came at me as I’m trying to exit the house smiling with candy canes and politely asked for them for breakfast —- whatever. It’s the last day of a 14 day break from school. A solid two weeks.

Let’s celebrate. Enjoy those candy canes!!! Tomorrow you go back to school and a schedule and the school bus being a solid deadline to make in the morning.

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I’m not even kicking myself about this. In the grand scheme, I don’t think I’ll look back and point saying “THIS. THIS was the moment my children’s lives were ruined. I should have fought the candy canes.” SMH

**In reference to my previous post “Corn Dogs”, my daughter ate all her (non-hot dog) dinner last night without complaining. She picked a few things off that she didn’t want, but overall did a wonderful job! She agreed for the month of January to eat whatever her father or I served. She has a sticker chart to track her compliance. We are her parents. We will not let a 5yr old run the house.** #parenting

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Creativity · Faith · Family · Parenting · Perspective

Keeping My Wits

Perspective. It’s all about perspective.

This past week was a doozy! Dance dress rehearsal on 8th. Church + Dance Recital + birthday party on 9th. 1st Grade Program on 10th.

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Birthday treats for 20 and some mild flooding at our home (which required a large pump for almost 4.5 hours) on 12th. Birthday treats for daycare on 13th.

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Dirt – Worm pudding cookie cups

Playdate and more birthday treats on 14th plus a family party at the bowling alley to celebrate.

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My 2yr old nephew’s bowling form.

Easter egg hunt and sister-mom time on 15th. Early church service followed by fellowship with friends and Easter lunch with my family on 16th.

And a full time job during the week.

It’s safe to say I was a grump by Saturday morning. My morning run left me coughing and sputtering instead of feeling energized. This was insane. Betty Crocker I am not. Egg Hunt? Rarr….

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Perspective. That powerful thing called perspective.

Two options here: Me sitting in a corner drinking coffee refusing to talk or make eye-contact — OR — Choosing to look at this as “WOW” my family is happy, healthy and engaged in spending time together. I should make sure I’m involved!

Option 2 is ALWAYS the better option. We enjoy each other’s time and company. It makes me feel great to make others feel good with time, friendship, and yes – birthday treats and Easter egg hunts!

The aftermath: Claustrophobia began to rise up as I looked around the house last night. The dirty laundry was piled counter high when my husband emptied our three strategically placed hampers in the bathroom. At least 3 days of clean dishes sat on the counter- each new load pushed to the side and another batch washed and laid out to dry. Paths had to be cleared from the kids’ doors to their beds so we could do our bedtime routine.

Thank goodness for perspective.

We have clean water, clothes, food, shelter, and love. All are blessings that are not to be overlooked! I promise not to go Maslow on you with a chart of the hierarchy of needs, but it bears witness that if those basic D-needs are met there is little room for complaint.

 It would be easy to look at the last 10 days and curl up in panic mode. (I did come close a few times in the moment!!!)  Instead, as my mom says, I (with my two sisters’ help) mindfully “flipped” as quickly as possible to the constructive side to keep my wits and appreciate the people and situations around me. It’s all about your view.

PERSPECTIVE.

Eternal question: is the glass half-full or half-empty?

**Here’s the recipe for the dirt-worm cups. They really are a treat! If you have to go non-dairy, almond milk works better than soy. Coconut milk would probably be good too but I’m not sure how well the pudding would set? I quadrupled the recipe for his class and put 6 short gummy worms in each cup- three under the cookies and three on top. The kids had a fabulous time digging the worms out of the pudding and cookie mix before eating!