Perspective

Catching Up

Autumn came rushing in on the heels of a couple of triple digit days. Currently, the weather outside is 43 degrees F and rainy. By rushing, I shall further describe as when the wind hit the house, I wondered if it would snap a tree or two in the yard. Mother Nature is so temperamental this year. This is the part where we all just shrug our shoulders and say “2020.”

I’ll reintroduce myself as it has been months since I last wrote. I’m Jen. Reading, writing, music, running, and noticing the details in nature are all enjoyable for me. My heart and soul belong to Jesus. My husband still gets best friend status after 20 years of being around me. He put a ring on it 15 years ago. A young boy and girl live at our house and look and act like us. All good stuff!

As for many others, this year has been in absolutely NO WAY as I had planned it in my head or on my beloved planner. Schools closed in March. The kids and I completely locked down for a couple of weeks. At that point, my husband (who I also own an “essential” business with and work with daily) informed me exhaustedly that “this isn’t working.” I went to splitting my days between being in the office (we moved all our customer contact outside) and schooling at home.

Note- I did not say homeschooling. My children attend a school with wonderful teachers. They listen, learn, and enjoy being there. Although I have a BS in Secondary Education, I have no interest in being my children’s main teacher. More power to the mamas and dads that do! Rather, I essentially proctored their education online with their teachers taking the lead via Zoom, Google Classroom, and a host of other educational sites they were assigned. We all survived, but anxiety abounded and many tears were shed by all.

Bring on summer! Kids played baseball and softball. They spent time with friends. We had a couple excursions to the local lake and went to our local pool three times. Both kids had bucket calves (big, spoiled babies!) for 4-H, so although our fair was extremely pared down due to the C-word precautions, we had activities there as well. Following that up, we went on vacation. We tried to take the road less traveled thru Nebraska, Wyoming, a slice of Montana, a corner of Idaho, and finished up in Utah. There was camping, geysers, wildlife, hiking, and as a friend referred to it- a vacation full of the outdoors – as the original social distancing. We traveled and lived this summer.

We are thankful that our mostly rural area has stayed healthy. School is back in session for almost 3 1/2 weeks IN PERSON. My kids are thrilled! (as if their mama!) I am confident that all the possible safety precautions are being taken while still conducting school as normally as possible. Thus far, nothing tied to the school. Hallelujah!

Now, here we are solidly standing in September. The successful start to school and the hope I refuse to surrender to the nay-sayers combine to help me remain optimistic. I refuse to watch the news for more than 10 minutes a day. Who doesn’t have anxiety with that constant noise?

With that, I leave you for a bit. I hope to write again soon. — Jen

Family · Love · Parenting · Perspective

To do or not to do?

I called my mom for reassurance. I’m a 35 year old woman who needed to hear my mom say “I think that’s a good idea for your family.”

The conversation has been mulling around in my brain for days. Do we or don’t we enroll in fall dance classes? Maybe we should try tumbling instead? Do we or don’t we encourage our son to sign up for fall flag football?

Leaning hard to the “No.” side of things, this was definitely a conversation that needed my spouse’s input. Although I am the chief get-kids-to-their-destination driver, everything we sign up for impacts all of us. Dinner schedules, my level of stress, when I need to leave work, can I work late?… All the pieces revolve around what we are committed to..

The pressure to sign up for extra kid’s activities is immense. It’s a weight I never giphy8anticipated carrying. The cost isn’t great either. Art classes, sports, dance, tumbling, volunteer opportunities, library activities…

Is my child going to be left out if she/he doesn’t sign up? Will they be athletically or academically behind?

Honestly… the answer is no.

No- all the way – no. Last time I checked, my 8 year old wasn’t trying out to be on the farm team (aka the minor leagues) for major league baseball. My daughter isn’t going to be in the Rockettes at age 6. Nor will taking the fall semester off from extra classes stunt their abilities.

Drawing this line in the sand will hopefully allow my family and friends time to be together. Let’s grill out on the patio for dinner! How about a nice bike ride on a Tuesday night after school? Invite a friend over to play for a couple of hours? Sure. I don’t need to schedule around this class or that class.

This basically sounds like utopia after the frenzied summer we’ve had. Although I swore we weren’t going to be THAT overscheduled family, we absolutely were. To say no… it’s a bold choice in our current culture. Being busy, scheduled, and enrolled in everything imaginable to enrich ourselves has left us all drained.

Our conversation about this was short and sweet. My husband agreed completely. Now, to finish convincing myself that I’m not blighting my children’s interests and aspirations I called my mother. She listened without judgement as I presented my case for NOT being involved and replied “I think that’s a good idea for your family.”

Isn’t it sad that the pressure to please others is so great that I needed to hear my mother reassure me that I was making the correct choice for MY family? Thank goodness for amazing beautiful souls like hers.

Don’t we all want to have the freedom in our schedule to do things like this?

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After a fall semester off from the extras, it’s possible that we will be ready and eager to do winter activities like basketball or dance. Perhaps we’ll discover that we enjoy less time running around. Either way, we’ll roll with it when it comes.